People see the scars on my arms and legs and they tell me to stop in various ways.
But what people don’t see is all the other ways I harm myself. I get myself into bad self-destructive situations. I smoke, I drink, I take a little too much Xanax, I get into pointless arguments.
Self-harming isn’t just cutting yourself or even burning, hitting, etc.
The actions you take can be self harm too.
It may not be the definition. Maybe it doesn’t count. But to me, these are ways I hurt myself.
I’m putting myself in a situation that will lead to bad consequences. But I can’t help myself. I don’t know how to stop.
I don’t want to talk about the situation… I told myself I’d turned over a new leaf. Yet here I am following this path of self destruction once again. And I don’t know how to make it stop.
People like me get one hell of a bad reputation. But… maybe if they were in my situation, they’d realize how hard it is. Maybe they wouldn’t think so badly of me. Well, I think badly of myself. But it feels out of control, I feel myself going through the actions, getting myself into this situation, and feeling helpless.
I just gotta hold on till I see my therapist. I need real advice, I have a real problem here.
I don’t want to be this person anymore.