After living with a diagnosis of Bipolar I for 9 years, I can honestly say that it is a blessing. What?!?!?! You may be asking as you read this. Yes, it’s true, having Bipolar is a blessing. Why?!?!? I will explain.
First of all, who else can say they can vacillate between moods within minutes of each other and still manage to stay sane? Who can laugh, sing, dance, and cry all while making dinner and with her toddler dancing along with her? Who can listen to a Pitbull song, and feel so moved by the upbeat tempo and meaning that she cries as she is driving to a work meeting? Who?, you may ask. This writer is who. This woman who has been called everything from lunatic, crazed, insane, impulsive, to say the least. I don’t consider myself any of those adjectives, rather I think I am eccentric, sane, responsible, and spontaneous! Take that Webster’s Dictionary!
Yet, I cannot do this alone. I have the support of my family, my psychiatrist, my friends, and now, my social media community whom I consider colleagues.
If you are reading this and have been recently diagnosed, I feel your pain. After my initial diagnosis, I was so drugged up on 5 different medications round the clock that I was a walking zombie, without emotions whatsoever. But hang in there, I know it’s easier said than done, but it is do-able because I did it and I consider myself a #Bipolar Survivor.
The only thing I miss is the mania. The rest is a curse. I have mental and physical scars to prove how bipolar is not a blessing to some of us.
I like to think of my diagnosis as a blessing because I see the beauty in the darkness, sounds cliche or metaphysical, but it’s true for me. Granted, it took me 9 years to be able to say this, but know that there is beauty within all this darkness.
The only good thing I have found is the people I have met and the awareness of mental illness that I wouldn’t otherwise have had. And, it made me slow down. I was always go, go go. I find the symptoms to be more of a curse than a blessing. I am happy you found a way for them to work for you.
I think a definite benefit to living with this illness is that we are compelled to pay more attention to how we think and interact with the world. The Others never get challenged like we are challenged. It is, of course, up to us to make a better mind for ourselves — you can’t have this disease, do nothing, and expect fabulous results. But think of the emotional shallowness of most people out there –the ones who don’t get the complexity of the mind and the emotions. We are not like them. Thank the Universe!